Emotional rescue
Employees suffering with a personal crisis need help. Here’s how HR plays a role.
Most organizations will likely notice an increase in troubled employees in the coming years, thanks in no small part to the large numbers of aging Boomers. Experts offer tips to employers who find themselves facing the challenge of an employee in crisis.
Jane Sleeth, a disability consultant, had a friend with a problem.
The friend, who happens to be a business owner, described to Sleeth how a valued 19-year employee had recently suffered a major lapse in her performance.
"She shows up late for work," the business owner told Sleeth. "Sometimes she doesn’t even show up at all. I suspect she is taking some sort of drug. she seems stoned when she comes in."
Sleeth’s friend wondered if the employee had an addiction problem and was even considering terminating her. The friend asked if Sleeth could offer any advice.
At this point it was Sleeth who started asking questions: Could there be anything else (aside from a possible substance abuse problem) at play in the situation, she enquired. Sleeth’s friend then remembered some crucial details.
She recalled that the employee had gone through a difficult break-up a year earlier and sometime before that an ex-boyfriend of hers had committed suicide.
Suddenly, the friend connected the dots: these past events were still affecting the employee.
Sleeth, who works with Optimal Performance Consulting, an ergonomics and disability management consulting and training firm with representatives working across Canada, says stories like these offer a message many employers should understand: Good employees do not suddenly become bad ones without a reason.
When there’s a noticeable change in someone’s attitude or performance, some factor, often something in their personal life,can be the cause.
Stories like this also illustrate that the full effects of a traumatic loss, or a personal crisis, don’t always manifest themselves immediately and can often set in long after many would think the suffer achieved "closure" and moved on. And this is a lesson employers need to understand because Sleeth points out that at some point in their lives, most employees will face personal issues and crises that overwhelm their ability to cope at work.
Problems can involve anything from loss of a loved one or dealing with a sick or elderly parent, to perhaps a diagnosis of cancer.When these things happen, employees need support from their employer — and not at the performance level, but at the mental health level, Sleeth says.
"Your employees are people who want to do well in the workplace," she says. "But like most of us, there will be a time in their lives when they have mental health issues." And she says that employers must recognize and prepare for this reality, or it will catch them by surprise. In fact, the first thing most experts recommend is that HR departments learn how to deal with and support distressed or traumatized employees before the need to do so arises.
According to Dr. Louise Hartley, vice president of employee and organizational health with Family Services Employee Assistance Programs, employers should do so soon. Hartley says most organizations will likely notice an increase in troubled employees in the coming years, thanks in no small part to the large numbers of aging Boomers. In fact, Hartley says her organization is already receiving more and more calls from companies needing help for employees following personal catastrophes and traumatic loss. It’s a trend she attributes to the demographic phenomenon. "We call them ‘life-altering’ events," says Hartley. "We’re getting calls about what to do when, for example, an employee’s spouse dies of cancer, or a team member gets a diagnosis of cancer.That has a ripple effect in terms of how the employee and the people around them feel." While a prolonged state of turmoil is a normal reaction to personal trauma, it can take weeks or months to subside.And experts agree an effective support system is key to a person’s recovery. Sleeth of Optimal Performance Consultants says most companies are in no way prepared for such a task.
Healing at work
Ideally, she says, the HR department can create a climate and culture that will provide formal and informal support to the returning employee. This occurs through a return-to-work process; by offering support to the co-workers who may need to speak with someone in HR and/or the employee assistance program (EAP); by learning how to help the affected employee; and by having a system in place that will provide counselling for the employee, either in the community or through the EAP. "In the absence of a good HR department and all of these processes in place," says Sleeth, "The chances of the person successfully returning to the workplace will be diminished considerably."
But how much can a company expect from an employee in crisis? While HR is faced with balancing the individual’s well-being and resuming normal operations, some companies understand better than others the nature of a devastating loss and what it does to an individual.
Someone who knows the effects of such a loss is Ned Levitt. Long after his 18-year-old daughter Stacey stepped off a curb while jogging and was fatally struck by a car, the corporate commercial lawyer had a terrible time sleeping. He would often wake up in the middle of the night, so much so that he eventually started bringing files home with him to work on in the middle of the night. After the tragedy, Levitt says the lawyer in him wanted answers but found none. So he studied the grieving process itself.He ultimately became fascinated with the subject. Eleven years later he is now a sought-after speaker and volunteer grief counsellor. Much of his grief work involves talking to companies about how to better support a worker, or even an entire workforce, after a traumatic loss. Levitt, along with Hartley and Sleeth, have a series of suggestions for employers who find themselves facing the challenge of an employee in crisis.
TIP: Understand healing takes time
When dealing with an employee following a traumatic loss, Levitt stresses the importance of creating what he calls "a culture of empathy" in the workplace.This can include revising some HR policies — such as the three-week bereavement leave that is standard in so many organizations. There are things people just don’t understand about what a personal crisis or even tragic loss does to a person, says Levitt. For example, most of the people he consults who have lost a child tell him the same thing: it’s only after about three months that the crisis really sets in — long after the funeral, the condolences and the support has subsided. "It gets really lonely, really scary, and that’s when a lot of issues will come up," says Levitt. "With traumatic loss, you’re still getting wounded often for a year or more." And for some losses, the recovery time can take even longer, he says.
"The death of a child, frankly," Levitt says. "It’s a five- to seven-year process before you’re back to feeling human again."
The longer it takes companies to understand the intricacies of these extreme emotional struggles, be they the loss of a child, or a parent, or even the end of a marriage, the further they are from connecting with employees at critical times.
But according to Dr.Hartley of Family Services Employee Assistance Programs, in some cases, it’s not the employer who misunderstands the reality of grieving.
"Some employees want to rush back to work," says Hartley. "We help managers to be able to say,‘We want you back, but please make sure that you’re taking the time that you need to deal with things and get yourself ready to come back.’"
Failing to do this can lead to a lot of "presenteeism", she says — the idea of suffering workers who show up but are non-productive.
"[Loss] sort of clouds people and affects their ability to make decisions and concentrate," she says. "People aren’t going to feel fully present until they’ve had a chance to process it and feel like they’ve got an action planned for it."
TIP: Coaching co-workers
For many companies, says Hartley, standard procedure after a trauma is to ask an EAP representative to offer guidance in a group setting. She says it’s a good idea to get the group together soon after they learn about the traumatic event.
"Just tell staff:‘In response to the sad news, people have been asking how to support [the affected employee(s)], so we’ve brought someone in to help you find ways of doing that,’" she says.This meeting, she stresses,must be voluntary. No one should be required to attend. At this stage employers can also coach employees in condolence etiquette. "People don’t know," Hartley says. "Should they be talking about it? Should they not be talking about it? Let’s say it’s a cancer diagnosis. People can’t really identify, so what we say is that you want to make sure to keep in touch. Often it’s just saying to the person: ‘Can I give you a ride to the hospital when it’s your treatment day?’Or dropping by a meal, without the person having to ask."
TIP: The role of managers
EAPs also coach employers in how to handle a situation that seems to be affecting the employee — and company operations — over a longer term than expected.
"We coach managers not to analyze, but to just identify what behaviours they are seeing and put it in a supportive context," she says. "It’s not saying: ‘You should be over it by now.’ It’s saying: ‘It’s been a couple of months, and I notice you’re still struggling with your performance, and I’m sure you’re aware of it. I’m concerned about you and wanted to make sure that you know the EAP is there.’"
Individual EAP counselling, if affected employees choose to seek it, may be the next logical step if the feeling of suffering persists.
"Unfortunately, if it continues," says Hartley, "you’re going to have to call them back in and say, ‘I don’t know if you went to the EAP, but you’re still not back up to your performance level and this is becoming a problem.’"
EAP: No cure-all
Sleeth believes EAPs can only do so much and are often ill-equipped to help employees after a lot of life-altering events, such as the death of a co-worker, a child, or even say a best friend. That’s because each case, and each victim or sufferer is different. She offers some specific advice to employers who are looking to hire an EAP service following a traumatic event.
"Use their services," she says, "but be aware of their limitations."
Sleeth recommends employers ask EAPs the tough questions up front before signing on, and ensure there are objective means of holding them accountable for their work.
"EAPs can be effective," says Sleeth. "Although it needs to be pointed out that most employers do not measure outcomes associated with using the EAP providers."
Sleeth says evidence for best practices for mild depression, or mild depression with anxiety, shows employees will benefit from some coaching with their supervisor, HR and perhaps the EAP. This coaching involves coping skills, selftalk and visualization, to develop more resilience in coping with stressors.
If the condition is more severe, however, Sleeth says that the employee may need to be referred to a psychiatrist. Hartley agrees EAPs are short-term and solution- focused, offering on average four hours of service to an individual. In cases of a prolonged grief reaction, she says the EAP refers the person to a specialist and stays connected with that person until a successful connection is made.
Having counselled many people trying to cope with the loss of a child, Levitt also cautions companies not to rely strictly on an EAP for an employee in personal crisis. The grieving parents who consult him, in fact, often express great disappointment. "They tell me the EAP ‘just didn’t get it.’ It’s band-aid stuff," he says. "I guess EAPs have a role. Unfortunately it’s a poor crutch for a lot of organizations." Levitt says the big problem is companies want to find an answer, fix the problem, and resume normal operations,with traumatic loss as with any other problem they might encounter.He believes companies must drastically change their approach. "What we’re talking about is not fixable," he says. "You’re looking for coping, not fixing. Companies are like the military.They have rules. But after a life-altering, devastating event, the rules have to be much more flexible."
Return to work
While returning to work might seem inconceivable after a life-altering event, a supportive workplace can actually be a welcome refuge from the sadness of one’s personal life. "I think HR professionals are in a unique position to make a difference," says Levitt. After his daughter’s death, Levitt was fortunate to have a workplace with supportive individuals. "When I came to work, at least people paid attention to me," he says. "I wanted to be there."
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